Weekend of Doom

September 8: Trig session test, Physics Lab practical test
September 8 – 9: Last two days of IW
September 10-12: First Trimestral Exams
September 13: ACET

… How sadistic is that? :|

This weekend is crucial to my academic dignity. I have four IW cards, eleven/nine trimestral exams and one majorly big college entrance test to pass, pass, pass. I must not buckle.

T_______T

I’m nervous for the ACET. I don’t feel prepared. I’m a failure at Math. I can BS my way through English, but I’m just totally worried about the Math. I have a mock ACET tomorrow, though. It might as well be my only real review before the actual ACET. I almost forgot about it. I shall remind my parents so they can arrange my ride. Huhuhu. :|

My brain, it melts.

What’s the word?
That’s the word!

What’s the time?
4D last time!

Aww.

4D WIN!

We used to be a square, now we’re an octagon.
4D just got edgier!

I love my pussycat dolls and soulja boys. 83

I haven’t blogged all this week. It’s been sabayang pagbigkas practice day in and day out. I don’t mind, really. I love hanging out with my class. Tomorrow’s practice won’t be at my house though, it’ll be at Raizel’s. I don’t know what to expect since the environment definitely won’t be as liberal as my house – goodbye boisterous yelling and Cruel Intentions 3 – but I guess I’m finally getting my wish of getting out of my house. Note to self: Be careful what you wish for. >_<

I’m stuck with the problem of transporting all our props to Raizel’s tomorrow. Good luck to me, our props are a little bit bigger than life-sized. T___T

Not to mention that I haven’t done anything academic this past week. I haven’t started on the pile of homework given to us – come to think of it, I don’t even think I have the complete list :| – nor have I done any reviewing for the ACET. I’m in the second batch of the first day. I forgot to take note of the exact details, but they’re posted on our bulletin board. ACET math is supposedly the hardest math of all the college entrance tests, so it will definitely be the death of me who’s oh so bad at numbers. I think Logical and Abstract Reasoning will kill me too, but my mom said she’d help me with these techniques she learned at law school, a place where, according to both my parents, I will eventually set foot in. (Set foot in, in this context, means to sink into slowly and painfully, like quicksand.)

I put Legal Management as my first choice, and I do not have any course choices in the School of Humanities. Surprised? Me too. If I pass the Ateneo, I wish to shift into a course at either the School of Humanities or the School of Social Sciences. As god as my witness, I do not want to be a lawyer. I really, really don’t. T__T

I can play a lawyer on a top-rated soap opera, though. XD

Senioritis!

I’m feelin’ it crashing over my like large, lazy waves. Emphasis on lazy.

With the UPCAT already over and my ACET forms already in Ateneo, it’s as if I could care less about the rest. I didn’t submit a form to UST anymore, and my DLSU and UA&P forms are still pristine and blank. I seem like I’m dead set to go for DLSU, but really, I just want to go to college. Emphasis on I just want to go to college.

These days, it’s been sabpag this and sabpag that. Sabayang Pagbigkas, and miraculously, I’m at the forefront of its development. :O Alexa, Raizel and I have been zipping around in preparation of this. Plotting out our practice schedules and agendas for those practices, it’s as if the poem grows longer and longer and longer. ._______. I’m the worst at memorization, so more points of pressure on me to be a good example. Durgh.

I have an Economics session test tomorrow. It’s two sessions combined, so it’s everything about Supply&Demand and Elasticity. I’m more or less well-versed here already, I just have to memorize the four standard thingies on the shifting of graphs and the formula for computing this thing that I have to remember. I sound like such a failure, but whatever. >___< Other than that, I’m pretty much dandy. I should be worried, I think. Or at least not so lax. After all, Economics is prevalent in my course choices. Which is weird, because I’m me. :|

The weeks ahead are going to prove challenging, and I really pray for the physical strength to get by. I’ve been having these wicked stomach pains since Sunday. It usually starts out with intense hunger, where my heart begins to race and I begin to tremble. Getting to sustenance is often an ordeal. Once I get my shaking hands on some food, I eat as if I were starved for an indefinite period of time. I just stuff it down my throat, barely enjoying the taste, just to get food in my stomach. My stomach aches after that, but I guess it’s because of how fast I ate? The strange thing is, after less than an hour, the hunger pangs begin to act up again. Sometimes I can’t help but sleep it off, it’s a sharp pain that extends up to my throat. When I get home, the same thing happens again. Late at night, I have to get up for a crap. A stinky crap. And then I sleep a tired sleep and I wake up tired and well, it’s really the same thing. I was talking to Bel (Hi, Bel. :-h) about it, and she thinks it’s a worm. That sounds plausible, but I really don’t have time to get it checked out. It’ll cause unnecessary stress for everyone – my eternally paranoid grandmother, most especially – and take precious time out of my schedule. I just hope this comes to pass soon enough. I can’t get sick(er).

A big huhuhuhuu at my life right now. Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu. T_______T

UPCAT thoughts

Traffic at six o’clock in the morning, kamusta. :-h

~ I don’t wanna say much about it, especially my opinion on the content. I’d rather keep it to myself, for fear of bad karma in the future. Whether anything is easy or hard, it’s all a matter of perception anyway. HUHUHU SO HARD.

~ I prayed to the Lord for wisdom and discernment, and the calmness of mind to act accordingly throughout the test. I told Him, I don’t want to replay the test over and over in my mind, playing out what I could’ve done better. I guess you could call me around 90% satisfied with my performance during the exam. I kinda buckled twice, in the middle part of Math and towards the end of Reading Comprehension, but I forgave myself. It was inevitable for me to crumble during Math, and I luckily found the strength to pull myself together to finish the Reading Comprehension to the best of my abilities despite the given circumstances.

~ I can’t help but hope that the mock UPCAT really is a notch higher and as predictive as Sir Joel said it was. I got good stats for my mock UPCAT, good enough, so hopefully I learned from it and took its lessons to the actual UPCAT.

~ I don’t want to be one of the people who took the UPCAT just to say that they passed it. I used to be, but that’s really so selfish. I took the UPCAT because I want to go to UP, be it Business Economics or Creative Writing. Should I pass the UPCAT, I will take it as a sign that the slot in either course was really meant for me, and I will fight for it even if I pass the ACET or the DLSUCET. If not, then that just means that there’s someone more deserving than me, someone whose odds are more favorable for UP than my own.

~ Despite my viewpoint stated above, I do not want to receive a letter of rejection in the mail. Who does, anyway? I’d rather a screencap of doom from http://upcat.up.edu.ph/ instead. .____.

~ Right after the UPCAT, I drowned my sorrows in Pancake House. Baby back ribs, banana pancakes and an extra thick strawberry milkshake. Nyuuu. @.@

~ I took a nap at 3pm, and I woke up barely half an hour ago. Entrance tests are so draining. @.@

~ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Mt. 6:33)

My UPCAT is tomorrow.

August 2, Saturday, 6.30am, Institute of Chemistry
August 2, Saturday, 6.30am, Institute of Chemistry
August 2, Saturday, 6.30am, Institute of Chemistry

Hashire! Kagayake! Hikatte misero!

July ends tomorrow.

I got the results of my mock UPCAT today.

English: 92.00%
Math: FAIL 62.00%
Science: 78.00%

Average: 77.33%
Passing: 60.00%

The mock UPCAT is supposedly a notch harder than the actual UPCAT, and somewhat predictive. Therefore, I do not know how to feel. :|

August 2, Saturday, 6.30am, Institute of Chemistry
Here I come!

:|

And.

& I finally submitted my Ateneo essay, satisfied with its content. I posted it on my DevArt and Multiply. Here‘s the link to the former, for reference.

& The last day of First Aid Training is tomorrow. It’s all exams and practicals. If we don’t pass, we have to repeat the course. T___T I have to study bandaging more than the rest. And remember to let my elbows touch the floor during CPR.

& The UPCAT is in a week, and I feel so unprepared. One part is screaming for me to cram, the other’s feeling disincentivized because I won’t pass anyway. :| My mock UPCAT is on Sunday, from 8am to 12nn. I’m just going to read up on Science and review certain Math formulas. I wanna see how far I can go on stock knowledge, which is really the point of the entrance test.

& I was so out of it during Economics class. The heat was making me fall asleep. Good luck to me in college. :| Unless I go to DLSU. XD

& I received a letter today. It was addressed to my parents but it was only stapled closed so it wasn’t confidential. I peeked inside and chuckled. Math remedials, haller. :-h So bad at numbers, so very bad at numbers. In ten sessions, I’m expected to catch up. Game, let’s do this.

& I wonder if I have to take remedials for CSDC. I still don’t have vigilancia duties, and it’s been around two weeks since we started. :\ I don’t think I did that bad in my practicals. Did I? :| I got to cite the handbook and the implementing guidelines once, and I even got the number of reports question right. So, idk. I don’t want to take remedials since I have Math to think of and stuff, but I will if I have to. Sigh.

& I wanna work in advertising and marketing.

Deadliest deadline is Wednesday.

I just cried over my Ateneo essay
because it does not exist.

Free day, Friday

Our teachers are probably off being holy in their retreat right now. Me, I just woke up half an hour ago. I’m blissful, but I’m not exactly looking forward to this day.

At the insistence of my parents, I restart my voice lessons today at 3pm. It’s such a hassle. >_< I needed to go to Nina’s house to tape our THE infomercial, but I guess that plan is foiled. In any case, I told both her and Cara that I’d love to do the video editing. Because honestly, I really would. X)

Since I’ll be stuck at home for the better part of the day, I’m going to read the reviewers from Sir Joel and my LSC books. With two weeks to go til the UPCAT, I’m doing all I can do to not panic. The back of my mind is racing and reeling, the red alert alarm blaring deafeningly. It’s just like that episode of Spongebob where he only knew fine dining and breathing, and all the little Spongebobs began to panic because they realized that they threw out his name.

Aside from reading for the UPCAT, I also have a senior’s responsibilities to fulfill. If there’s one thing I can’t neglect, it’s my schoolwork. I really need to show drastic improvement this year. It’ll be my strongest argument for when the time to appeal comes around. I have to finish to lay out three IW cards so I can finish them in school next week, begin writing my prayers for both CL and CSDC, doodle a jacket design, and moar moar moar.

I should probably devote an hour or two today for my Ateneo essay. I need to start drafting it, at the very least, so I can send it to people for critique, giving them ample time to read and I to revise. “Are there any significant experiences you have had or accomplishments you have realized that have helped to define you as a person?” Well, I’ll find out tonight. Before I begin to write with the intention of letting the panel know more about me, I think should first know more about myself.

Huh. Not exactly a free day, after all.

I consider our present sufferings insignificant
compared to the glory that will soon be revealed to us.
(Romans 8:18)

Dear friends, don’t be surprised by the fiery troubles
that are coming in order to test you.
Don’t feel as though something strange is happening to you,
but be happy as you share Christ’s sufferings.
Then you will also be full of joy when he appears again in his glory.
(I Peter 4:12-13)

Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them:
because greater is He that is in you,
than he that is in the world.
(1 John 4:4)

AMEN LORD AMEN.
I’m ready ad infinitum.

Green-minded?

I’m reading more about DLSU, their College of Business and Economics. The solidity of their curriculum and well-roundedness is inspiring and exciting. No one can deny that DLSU is the school for business, in the same vein that Ateneo is the school for law and UST is the school for medicine. (UP? Well, it’s the school. @___@)

If I were to be accepted into DLSU, I’d love to double degree in Economics and Advertising/Business/Legal Management. A single degree in Applied Economics would make me very happy as well. Either way, I am satisfied with my choices and confident in the thoroughness of my (future) education.

I really don’t know what I’m talking about, actually.

I want to go to La Salle. I also want to go to Ateneo. I also want to go to UP. I want to go everywhere.

I want to go to college. o_______o

EDIT: I just noticed that the titles of my last four entries began with the letter D. o_______o